


Anna & Benedict - Mostly Topical One Shot Tales

by MizUndahStood



Series: Dance Me Into Love [3]
Category: Benedict Cumberbatch - Fandom, British Actor RPF, Sherlock (TV), Sherlock (TV) RPF
Genre: Current Events, F/M, Headcanon, Inspired by Recent Headlines, Non-Canon Relationship, One Shot Collection, Original Female Character/Woman of Color, Porn With Plot, Sexual Fantasy, Sorry Not Sorry, Steamy, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-04
Updated: 2015-02-04
Packaged: 2018-02-24 03:44:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2567000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MizUndahStood/pseuds/MizUndahStood
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Characters fr "Dance Me Into Love" in a series of “mostly topical” one shot tales.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Anna & Benedict ...And, Sherlock?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In “Dance Me On & On" Anna & Benedict make out in a butler's pantry, and she reveals a sexual fantasy to him in which she's part of a threesome with two of his characters.  
> Anna said that she'd revised the fantasy so, Benedict has been wondering about the original, and presses her for details. The conversation goes something like this:

"Anna?"  
"Yes, Ben..."

"You remember snoggin' in the pantry at your brother's house?"

"Yeah, a little groping before breakfast. Mussed cloting. Growling stomachs. Secrets shared." she purrs in her earthiest mezzo.

"About that... You said that you'd revised your fantasy. What was the original?" he playfully inquires.  
"So, you really wanna do this long distance? On the phone?" she wonders.

"FaceTime, then. I'd love to see your expressions as you tell me about your fantasies" he chuckles devilishly.  
"Cool. Hit me back in five." her reply.

"Five whole minutes? Why, Anna?"

"Gotta get comfortable. I think you might care to divest self of restrictive garments and relax a bit. Light a smoke, lovely beverage, perhaps?..."

"Point taken. But, the smoking comes after. See you in five?"  
"Of course. ♪I will be right here waitin' for yooou♪" she giggles.

Both scurry about to prepare themselves for presentation. Anna pulls her hair into a high ponytail, fluffs her curls just so, and pulls down a stray tendril or two to frame her lovely heart shaped face. Next, she drapes herself in a pink pareo and puts on her readers.

Benedict settles in with two fingers of single malt, wearing a clean t-shirt, and grey boxer briefs. He lines up lube, tissues, a lighter and smokes on his bedside table. When they reconnect, they exchange smiles and dive back into their conversation.

"A sarong? Interesting choice, Luv. He reaches under his chin and scratches behind his earlobe.

"Comfort and access. This might get squishy. Speaking of... I see you're ready to have a smoke after our chat. I also saw a box of tissues, and lube." she observes.

"Thought I'd set them aside for later. Now... Your fantasy, please." He uses his sexy lower register to coax her into sharing.

"Okay. Before I re-imagined my wank-bank, the object of my lust was Sherlock" she admits.  
" _Noooo_! Not you too!" Benedict laughs.

"Well, when he did that pirouette in The Sign of Three, I was smitten."

"So, you'll explain why you think you'd be lucky enough to capture him in your ravenously naughty clutches." he chuckles.

"Because, I'd be able to read him. Every teensy micro-expression laid bare. I wouldn't bother trying to _seduce_ him. Wasted effort, yeah?"

"Sounds vaguely plausible, Anna. Do go on..." He encourages her to continue, tongue firmly in cheek.

"A bit of backstory? I'm doing my Post-Doc at The Met, where I've been assigned to work with Sherlock as he traipses around town doing The Work" she begins.  
"My theory is that Irene and Janine fell short because they viewed Sherlock as a prize they could win, and maybe possess. That, and because _they were written that way.._."

" _Anna..._ " he rumbles.

"I'm not critcizing the wit and wisdom of Mofftiss. J _uuu_ st sayin'." she adds.  
"Pursuing him wouldn't be on my list of ways to entice him. I'd intrigue him by being _aloof_. And teaching him to dance. I quite imagine dancing with him would be better than sex. Probably the only way to cozy up to his transport in a meaningful way." Anna surmises.

" _Fascinating_. I'm riveted" says Benedict.

"One of Sherlock's specialties is keeping emotional distance with his deductions. He'd try that crap on me, and I'd turn it back on him. Dr Eberhardt has skills, she doesn't need wiles!" she laughs.

"I'd teach him to Tango. He'd be extraordinarily _proficient_ , but he'd not be able to dance it with true **_passion_** , and that would frustrate him to no end."

"You've given this a great deal of thought, Anna."

"Well... _Yeah_. My brain is well ordered, Ben.  Sometimes it's hard to turn off the behaviorist, and just be me. Dance frees me. That's also why I'm so passionate when we're together. I can allow myself to just let it go and be a woman, not a skillset. Especially making love to you. I surrender, and nothing exists in that moment but how good it feels to be with you. Even times like now, when I can't touch you." Anna purrs.

She leans towards the lens and blows Benedict a kiss. He catches it and holds it over his heart.

"I miss you, Anna. Those stolen moments in Toronto weren't enough." he sighs.

"I know. But, ya gotta admit... Sneaking off during boring parties has its advantages."

She looks into the camera, licks her lips, and smiles devilishly. Benedict quirks a brow and says "If you don't keep going with your seduction scenario, we won't get there tonight.You're teaching Sherlock the tango, a _nn_ d?..."

"Yes. And curiosity gets the better of him. Like the song says, he's been to every single book he knows to to soothe the thoughts that plague him. He can't make sense of how his transport is reacting. And, during a lesson, lays a big wet one on me. No tongue, but with precise head tilt and perfectly placed lips." She continues.

"Anna, move closer. I want to watch your mouth while you speak." Benedict thoughtfully requests. She frames her face so that her lips are more prominent on the screen, and continues her tale.

"One rainy evening, Dr Eberhardt and The Detective share a meal in Sherlock's flat. She's washing up the dishes and he follows her into the kitchen. He sidles up to her to offer his help with tidying up, and is politely refused. She dries her hands, and heads for the door, but he stops her."

"Please, Andromeda..." Sherlock nearly begs. She stops in her tracks, cants her head and looks at him curiously, because he's never used her given name. "Please don't leave. I haven't thanked you for dinner." He walks over to his desk and takes out his violin case. He rosins his bow as he speaks - I've heard this song leaking from your headphones, hope you'll enjoy it" He begins to play the prelude to Bach's Suite No. 1 in G major, BMV 1007. When he's done, he starts a soundtrack and plays along to "Coitus Musicalis" from The Red Violin soundtrack."

"She sits on the sofa and stares at him in stunned silence. Her eyes begin misting over a little as he plays soulfully for her. When he's through, he sets down his violin and takes a seat next to her on the sofa. She tucks her legs beneath her and stares at Sherlock for quite some time. The silence is palpable. Only the ambient noises of Sherlock's flat, and their breathing. She breaches the stillness to speak first: "Sherlock, _that was beautiful_. Thank you..." She reaches for his hand, ghosts her fingers over his, and he smiles at her, quite innocently. "Well, um... Thanks again, for dinner, doctor." She starts to leave the sitting room, and leans over to peck him on the cheek."You're welcome. Goodnight, Sherlock"

Benedict sighs longingly. "Sounds like things are about to pick up. This is wonderful, Anna."

"I need to get comfy, hold on a sec..." Anna rearranges her bed pillows, and lies on her side as she continues.

"Sherlock feels a residual warmth where her lips had been, and he touches his cheek. He feels butterflies in his stomach, and races to catch her as she descends the stairs to 221C. He spins her around on the landing and kisses her. This time, he parts his lips and kisses her passionately. Her eyes fly open wide, but she kisses him back. He walks her back until she's pressed against the wall and keeps kissing her. She moans, and her body goes slack. Thinking she's passed out Sherlock stops abruptly, and asks " _Are you okay_?" She smiles at him and chuckles breathlessly."

" **Wow**. I... That was..." Sherlock crinkles his nose and asks her "Was that _okay_? Did I..." Before he completes his sentence, she grabs him by the collar of his dressing gown, and pulls him back into the kiss. He breaks away, cradles her face in his hands and gazes into her eyes. She's smoldering as she looks at him. Both are aroused and thoroughly confused. "Sherlock? Do you understand what we're doing? Kissing me like that? Are you collecting data for a case?  
    His expression changes. "I'm not experimenting. If that's what you're thinking. I'd like to be intimate with you. You fascinate me. I've never allowed myself to become aroused by anything other than my work."

"Ohhh, Anna... This is getting good. Do you mind if I get comfortable too?" He wonders aloud.

"Please do. Is it the story or my oh-so-smokey voice?" she coos.

"It's your voice saying those words. You have a way with words. Wish you were here. There'd be no talking, though.  Only sighs, and a few guttural moans" he chortles. Benedict props up his iDevice and turns out the lights. Anna hears rustling fabric, and the distinct pop of a plastic cap being flicked open. She grins and worries her bottom lip with her teeth as she closes her eyes to imagine what can't be see on screen. She feels herself becoming aroused as she continues to recount her fantasy.

"Ready for me?" she asks.

"God, YES! They're on the stairs and Sherlock admits to having a stiffy. Go on, Luv. Anna hears moist squishing, and a some faintly audible moans as she continues.

"Sherlock makes peace with the sensations coursing through his transport as he speaks "There aren't enough cold showers to make this feeling go away. I want to _touch_ you. I want to taste you. _Will you let me_? I can sense you'd like to do the same." "She looks into his eyes, and sees his pupils dilating as he speaks.

"Are you very sure, Sherlock?" she asks. He nods, and takes her hand in his. " _Please_. I've done my research. I think you might be surprised." She leads him by the hand down the stairs to the newly refurbished 221C.

"They enter her flat, and Sherlock remarks on the sparseness of furniture. "I knew when I accepted the Post-Doc assignment that I'd not need much furniture. More space for yoga and dancing. Your transport quite often causes mine a bit of stress."  
"Apologies, Dr Eber... I mean, _Anna_." She reaches for her speaker dock, and begins a playlist. Dean Martin's "Sway" wafts out of the speakers and fills the tiny flat."

Anna turns on her own speaker dock, finds " _Sway_ " and plays it for Benedict as she continues. "As they dance, she swoons in his arms. He suggests they take things further, and they deploy her Murphy Bed." she purrs.

_"Finally!"_ Benedict cheers.

"Patience, Grasshoppah..." Anna retorts, with a giggle.

"Once the bed is unfurled, they stand staring at each other. Sherlock sweeps her into a passionate embrace, and tells her..."

"He tells her how fucking yummy she smells. If this is _you_... She's been muckin' about with those crazy scent combos. Probably driven poor Sherlock nearly mad." Benedict proffers.

"And what might you suppose she smells like, Ben?" she teases. "Something sweet, of course." he counters.

"Perhaps you'd like to take over from here? _What would **Sherlock** do?_ " she coaxes.

"He'd pull her close and press his nose to her neck to inhale her scent. Then, he'd guide her down to the bed and kiss her while he takes off her shirt." He speaks in a suave baritone as he re-imagines Anna's fantasy for her.

"Diggin' this so far. _Keep going!!_  So, our boy is in full command of his transport. _Nice_!" she purrs, mischievously.

"He looks at her with curiosity, lust, and complete adoration. She returns his gaze... What was that word you used? I liked it..."

" _Smoldering_?" she shrugs.

"Ah. Yes, exactly. Her eyes are smoldering and she's soppy wet. They move to the middle of the bed and start snoggin'. Rather passionately, infact. They lie there side by side and he cards his fingers through her hair very gently. He reaches down and opens her bra with one hand. It falls away from her breasts and he slides a strap from her shoulder. She moans softly, and Sherlock leaves a trail soft kisses down her neck to her collarbone."

"Holy Shit, Ben. You're making _me_ wet." Anna says, voice tinged with lust.

"We'll have to do something about that, won't we?" He chortles and smiles at the lens for Anna's reaction.

" _Promise?"_ she asks, in a breathy mezzo.

"Oh, yes. Count on it..." he grins, before continuing.

"He stops at her collarbone to _lick the_ notch between her collar bones. She lolls her head back and moans. He smiles and continues to her breasts. He rests his head on one of her breasts as he explores the other. He marvels at the firmness of her breast and enjoys the smoothness of her skin. He begins to fondle it as he takes in the texture of her areola. Sherlock swipes it with his tongue and she groans. She arches her back, and he stops to look at her. "Sher- _Sherlock_?! Please don't stop!" she begs. He chuckles at her and obliges her request by placing her entire left areola in his mouth. He looks up at her. When she returns his gaze he smiles at her, and she goes completely boneless."

" _Ohhh_! You. Are. G _oooo_ d. I can close my eyes and imagine your hands and lips on me." she drawls.

"You mean _Sherlock_ , don't you?" he asks, somewhat coyly.

"No. _I mean you_ , Ben. I miss you, _miss you_ , _miss you..._ But, keep going. This is melting my screen!"

He quirks a brow as he continues "Sherlock kisses his way down her torso, and stops to swirl his tongue around her navel. She fists the curls on top of his head and growls. He slowly kisses his way to the waistband of her knickers kissing from one hipbone across to the other. Pulling down on them slightly, he reverses his path with a flattened tongue. Sherlock lowers his head and focuses his attentions on the crease between her crotch and thigh, placing light nibbles as he goes."

"Holy shit. He's gonna take off her panties now, isn't he?"Anna pants.

"Yup. Cleeean off!" he says in a perfect Clint Eastwood voice.

"Sherlock stands at the end of the bed, reaches down and hooks his fingers into the elastic of her waistband. She lifts her hips, and he wriggles her knickers off. He takes them and holds them in his hands longingly. He nuzzles the crotch with his nose,taking their silkiness, and enjoying the sweet traces of her smell. He closes his eyes, lolls his head back and moans before kneeling at the foot of the bed. Sherlock smoothes his fingertips over her thighs and pulls her, covers and all to the end of the bed. She gasps in surprise, but looks up and smiles at him playfully, propping herself up on both elbows. He stops to admire her glistening yoni and moves in to taste her for the first time. The texture fascinates him and he uses the tip of his tongue to trace the outline of her moist inner petals. She bucks her hips and mutters nonsensically as he presses his nose above her bud as he laps at her aching core. "Unnngh! _Sherrrrlock_!"

Having noticed Anna no longer in view, Benedict quirks his chin and crinkles his nose as he wonders where she's gotten to.

"Anna? You still with me?"

She rolls onto her side and looks into the camera, disheveled. Pupils dilated. "Damn! This is way hotter than I'd imagined in my thought bubble. Hey! If he makes her scream, isn't _Mrs Hudson_ gonna hear them? If _“She”_ is indeed _me_ , she'd be wailing like a Banshee by now. The sound of your voice describing Sherlocks curiosity and skill. Jeezus, Ben. I'd always pictured him as a _dorkably clueless_ and a little _handsy_ , buy very tender. The version that you've crafted is much more complex and intoxicating. I have only one complaint!... Get to the _fingers_! Put both fantasy Anna and me out of our misery!"

He laughs a deeply wicked rumble that makes Anna's toes curl. "What if I draw this out? Maybe Sherlock wants to feel her from the inside. Don't you _wonder_ what it would be like for him to hover over her and sink into her inch by inch until they're face to face?"

"Usually, I _might_. But right now, I just need him to get to the part where he slides his fingers inside her. He's almost there. The only question is does her use his tongue and his fingers? Or does he crawl up the bed and kiss her with her juices lingering on his tongue and kiss her?"

"Ben?" she whispers.

"We should stop here, Anna. Maybe pick this in our next chat. I'd closed my eyes while you were speaking, and now I need a shower and clean pyjamas. Hope we'll chat soon, so we can get Sherlock & Dr Eberhardt sorted." he utters in a breathy timbre.

" _Can't wait_! Looking forward to picking up from where we left them." she enthuses.

"Anna, will you think about coming here to do your Post-Doc? We could get the behaviorist and the detective together, _in the flesh_." He picks up his iDevice to show Anna his torso.

"That actually sounds like a good idea. We'll hafta work that out." she sighs. Anna rolls over and returns Benedict's gesture by panning up her body.

He wolf whistles and chortles. " _Love you_. _Miss you_. G'night, Anna."

" _Love You More_!" she says to him, imitating his voice perfectly.

Anna giggles as she reaches toward the camera. Tapping his nose on screen, she grins and says:

" _BOOP!_ Got yer nose! Nighty-nite!"

 


	2. Colour Commentary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benedict looks down at the dinner set out before him, but doesn't eat. He sits slumped forward, pushing food around with his fork when Anna decides the silence is too deafening.
> 
> He looks up, pushes his plate away, and narrows his eyes at Anna. His expression turns ice cold - an almost impenetrable thousand yard stare, but Anna intuits every tiny micro expression and tries to suss out what he's processing. "What's bothering you most? - Being stuck here during the storm, or being flayed alive in the global town square?"
> 
> "Ben, please... _Talk to me ___. I know it feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders right now. Of all the people in the world, you must know that I'd be the last to judge you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> REMIX! 
> 
> Someone pointed out to me that this might have been a little steamy, but was not filthy. So, I amended the story to include some hot, sweaty, sticky action. If that's what you're looking for scroll down 'til you find it. 
> 
> Kind of not edited. I'll fix it in post. 
> 
> ƸӜƷ

“There are no glass houses. The shades are drawn and "real" life begins. Some activities are impossible in the open. And these secret events are the voyeur's game..."  
“More or less, we're all afflicted with the psychology of the voyeur. Not in a strictly clinical or criminal sense, but in our whole physical and emotional stance before the world. Whenever we seek to break this spell of passivity, our actions are cruel and awkward and generally obscene, like an invalid who has forgotten to walk.”

Jim Morrison -“The Lords and the New Creatures”

 

Benedict sits on the banquette in Anna's breakfast nook thoroughly disheartened by recent events. Not only is he stuck in DC during a monstrous snow storm when he should be back on set in the UK, a recent gaff on a PBS talk show has garnered an epic and visceral reaction from the world press and a rather sound bollocking on social media during Awards Season. 

Benedict looks down at the dinner set out before him, but doesn't eat. He sits slumped forward, pushing food around with his fork when Anna decides the silence is too deafening. 

"Ben, you're not eating. You're not talking. And you look like hell. You can't go on like this. Please, talk to me. What bothers you more, being stuck here or being flayed alive in the global town square?" 

Benedict looks up pushes his plate away, and narrows his eyes at Anna. His face turns ice cold, nearly expressionless. But Anna notices every tiny micro expression and attempts to intuit what he's processing. She reaches across the table and pleads with him to open up.

"Ben, please... Talk to me. I know it feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders right now. Of all the people in the world, you must know that I'm not gonna judge you. I know that you meant no harm. Okay? I. Totally. Understand. Now, if you'd been on Fox and Friends, it'd be entirely different. Not that they'd ever have need for a cogent discussion about Turing on that channel... Anna clears her throat. Anyway, we aren't going to end world hunger, or solve the mysteries of the universe. It's just you and me, so put us both out of our misery long enough to speak your mind."

Benedict cards his fingers through his hair. He leans away from the table and props his head against the wall. Anna looks at him and sighs. She tries to make eye contact, but he looks away. She closes her eyes, and her chin quivers. In sheer frustration she withdraws the open hand she'd previously offered him, clenches her hand into a fist, and pounds the table angrily. The dishes clatter, and Benedict snaps out of his pout long enough to watch Anna's mood change before his eyes.

"I'm not gonna beg. Dammit Ben! I just... I can't with you right now!!" She leaves the table in a huff. She stomps over to her bedroom and shoves the door closed with her foot.  


In the quiet of her room, she shucks off her clothes in favor of wrapping herself in her fave fluffy robe. Anna snuggles the collar around her neck, takes a deep breath, and sighs. Deciding that she's in need of a little self comfort, she places her iDevice in the dock on her bedside table and chooses a playlist of soft, calming music. At first blush, this seems just the remedy to lift her spirits, but quickly changes her mind. She unwraps herself and puts on an oversized t-hirt. 

  
[](http://s1375.photobucket.com/user/Miz_UndahStood/media/fanfic%20illustrations/7BC5FEF9-535D-4DF8-8EBA-5AE12EC0DC20_zps9yitfu7q.jpg.html)

She goes back to the speaker dock to choose a playlist truly befitting her cantankerous mood, puts on wireless headphones and trudges across the room. Anna steps onto a riser and takes a seat behind he favorite indulgence - a complete drum kit. She tapes up her fingers, picks up her sticks, counts down, and plays along with the music.  
On the other side of the door, Benedict hears the thumping and clattering and raises his head. Not knowing what he'd be walking into, he decides to check on Anna, and heads over to her bedroom. He crinkles his nose and laughs out loud as he nears the door, realizing that the clatter and cacophony is actually drumming. He opens the door gingerly, lest he get pegged by a flying drumstick.

When he opens the door, he peeks around and sees Anna seated at a drum kit, playing aggressively, and pretty damned well. She sees him as he enters, and spins her sticks as she looks at him and shrugs. She plays through the song once more, pulls off the headset, then turns her attention to Benedict.

"Wow! You have a concert sized drum kit in your bedroom? Fuck, that is amazing!" He smiles.

"I forgot, we didn't spend any time upstairs here when you were last in town. Did we?" She winks. "Yeah, I don't ummm, I don't entertain in this room very much and the floor space was empty, so my brothers built me a riser and gave me these drums as a birthday present a few years ago. Not quite full sized though. It's an organic blend of Neal Peart's kit with Stewart Copeland's octobans and his signature snare. Just to show off She plays a cadence using the mentioned drums, before bragging on her fave part of her kit... "Vater sticks muthafukkaaah! Kinda cool, huh?" She wipes the sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand, and flicks it at Benedict.  
"For fuck sake, what must your neighbors say to you, Anna? Bloody hell! You were giving those drums a right bashing! !" He asks, truly amazed.  
"Nothing. The floor beneath me is concrete, and thanks to the wonky ceiling heights below - the top floor is all mine. My studio is beneath here. High ceilings made a cool little loft. So, my brothers made me an offer I couldn't refuse.  
Well, now that you are in my very personal space, i assume you're ready to talk, yes? Or should I move on from classic rock to percussion heavy pop and let you continue to pout and brood on the other side of my door?" She twirls the right drum stick through her fingers as she speaks.

Benedict quirks his chin and rumples his hair as he overthinks his reply. Anna shrugs, and moves down her playlist.

"Don't worry. I'll wait." Just as she replaces her headphones, he waves his hands at her and she scoots away from the drum set crosses her legs and stares at him blankly.

"Okay. I'm ready..." He acquiesces.  
"Good."  
"Fine!" He counters.  
"Look, I don't need your attitude. I've already had one installed at the factory." She states very succinctly.

Benedict tugs on an earlobe while he decides whether and what to share with Anna.

"Still cogitating? I'll go first then. Of all the people in the whole wide world, you should know that I understand the pressure you're under. Dude, you look miserable most of the time lately. But I'm sure that you didn't mean to offend anyone." Anna stands, places her hands on her waist and does a side bend before walking over to her speaker dock to change the music and lower the volume.  
"Once again, your mouth beat your brain to the punch." Anna shrugs. "Shame too. It was one of my favorite interviews of late. The rapport was very conversational. You were so engrossed in the subject matter, that you simply forgot to filter. Done and done. Your charm and naiveté very occasionally cause you problems. But, it's also what makes you so fuckin' irresistible." Anna takes Benedict's hand, and leads him over to the end of her bed. She sits down and pats the space next to her. He sits down and flops backward, covering his face with his hands. 

"OH!! Fuck my life! Why is this all this shit happening. Why now? I never wanted to be this famous. Not like this. All I've ever wanted was steady interesting work. Something to look back on years from now with my family and feel proud of what I've done. Sometimes, I feel like everyone wants to take a fucking chunk out of my hide. I've apologised. More than that..." He raises himself on his elbows and looks directly at Anna for reaction. She's been sitting silently, listening and smoothing a hand up and down his thigh as he vents.  
"Anna, are you crying?"  
"Yeah. Umm, no... Perilously close, though." She blinks the moisture from her eyes and drags a thumb under each eye for good measure. "Please, don't worry about me. I'm processing through this as you talk about it." Anna sniffles.  
"I don't want to burden you with all of my shit. I'll just stop."  
"No. I invited you to unload. Have at it. I meant it when I said this is a nonjudgemental space. But, if you don't mind, I do have a word or two for you, though."  
"That's fair."  
"In case no one ever told you how fickle the great unwashed public is, lemme clue you in on something - people who love you, or the idea of you will carry you along like a conquering hero. There are doubters sprinkled amongst the faithful, but they aren't the problem. It's the haters.There will always be detractors, Ben. And you're red meat to these people right now. Yummy, yummy, tasty filet of Cumberbatch. And, you are quite a dish." She smiles, and winks.  
"Now, back to doubters. They're easily distracted, sheeple that they are. And, they follow the herd. Right now the haters have amped up the volume, and the doubters have thrown in with them. You've heard of Katt Williams, right?" Benedict nods.

"Katt Williams knows how mutable a fandom can be." Anna clears her throat dramatically and launches into a perfect imitation of the comedian: "Haters have one job - to hate you. So, let ‘em. Be more confident. You are Benedict muthafucking Cumberbatch. Act like it. If you have ninety haters today, and you don't have a hundred and twenty by Valentines Day - I don't know what the hell are you doing with your life?"

Benedict laughs out loud and Anna knows that she's reached him. The light in his eyes is reignited. It seems, for the moment - that his mood has lifted. Good thing. There's snuggling to do, and who likes hunkering down with a grouch? 

"It always helps to have another set of eyes on something. Thanks for the reality check. And frankly, it needed to come from you. But I still feel like an idiot. After this hit the fan, I looked at the playback. It just rolled off my tongue like a fucking gumball. And Smiley didn't even flinch! Christ Almighty!" he whines.  
"Oh, no. Please stoppit! You were doing so well." Anna crawls up the bed and straddles Benedict. She looks him over, leans down and pins his shoulders to the mattress. "You talk too much. That's how you got into this mess in the first place. PEACE!... Be, still."  
"But, I..."  
"Shut. Up. Are you capable of that? Sheesh!"  
He nods, and gestures as if he's locking his mouth shut and tossing away the key.  
"Goood boy." She clicks her tongue.

"I don't know how much store you put into such things, Ben... but this is not a good time for you to be wandering off piste verbally. Mercury is in retrograde. From what I understand, all manner of fuckery is magnified during a mercury retrograde. So be more mindful of what you say, and be kinder to yourself. Stop calling yourself stupid. Or idiot or whatever the hell you said in your apology. You shoud chill with that shit. Your fans have given you quite a wide berth, so they'll almost always think of you kindly. And haters are looking for a reason to put you on blast anyway, so they don't count. A cogent apology has some very clear elements. First, hit with the ‘I’m sorry’ statement. Then move into an expression of regret for what happened. You did that. I thought it was nicely stated, and seemed to be in your voice. Other huge set pieces are an acknowledgment that you've disappointed someone, a little empathy about the footprint of your mis-step, and ya gotta ask for forgiveness. I think you covered all the bases. Nowhere, read... NoWHERE is it written that you have to debase yourself to appear more contrite.

He nods.

"It all starts with you. Self-talk is your conversation with the universe. Don't use that dialog to castigate yourself. Do. Not. And for fuck sake - the moment you have buy in for the hype, you're gonna gonna let your ego write some checks that the Bank of Cumberbatch cain't cash." She grabs the hair on top of his head and leans down until they're face to face. "Are you listening? Blink twice for yes..." He does indeed blink twice in response.  
"This is your life, man. It's not happening to you, It's responding to you. You will things into being not just with action, but with the energy and intention. Got it?" Benedict nods again.  
"Good. Are you tired of this shit yet? Cuz I'm bored of this topic. Let's do something else now"  
Benedict gives two thumbs up.  
"Let's take a bath, okay?"  
He moans. Anna laughs as she pantomimes removing a key from her bosom and unlocking his mouth.  
"Anna?"  
"Yes?..."  
"What must it be like inside your brain? You are such a wellspring of passion, and energy." Benedict cants his head and looks at Anna with a deep sense of adoration.

"What's it like? Most days, or just this moment?"  
"Either one..."  
"Some days it feels almost like a triathlon. Done the swim. Just ditched the bike, getting ready to run. But, on my best days? My passions keep me grounded. Otherwise I'd just be a oddball nerdling. There's something to be said discovering success as a late bloomer. More happiness, less stupid. Theoretically, anyway." He chuckles knowingly. Her remarks hit home with him once again. He smooths his hands up and down her thighs and pats her bum. 

"Why don't you draw us a bath. Neither of us ate dinner, and I damn sure ain't gonna skip dessert. I know you're on your best behavior dietarily right now - but it's a snow day and you're stuck with me until we can get you back across the pond, so relax a little, and be naughty with me. ‘Kay?" Anna leans down and nuzzles Benedict's nose. He smiles, purses his lips and exhales. She rolls off and sits up, but before she can leave the bed, he sits up too and draws her into a very tender hug.  
"What?" Anna chortles.  
"After that scene at the dinner table, this could have all gone pearshaped. Fuck! It almost did, didn't it? But you wouldn't let it. Thanks for that." Benedict kisses the back of her neck in tiny, increasingly aggressive pecks and nibbles. Anna leans into him and smiles.  
"Yeah, it could have. But I'm too stubborn to sulk without trying to put things right. And I didn't want the limited time we spend together to be wasted on moping, pouting and fretting over the rotational axis of your world. That's not how we roll, remember? But I've gotta admit, had you persisted - I was perfectly prepared to let your happy ass sleep on the sofa."  
Benedict squeezes Anna "Hey!"  
"Hey yourself, grouchy pants. I'm gonna go grab our dessert from the fridge. You sir, are going to run some bathwater for us. We've got a lot to make up for. By all rights we should be on sloppy sticky seconds right now, and I haven't even met Luigi yet..." Anna worries her bottom lip and quirks her left brow.  
"Mmm. I like how you think. We'll see what we can arrange."

He uses his lower register and Anna nearly melts into a puddle of chocolate on the spot. There's a delicious fluttering behind her navel, and she feels a slight warming on the apples of her cheeks. She lolls her head back, and hums.  
"Ya know, when you do that thing with your voice, god Ben... it makes me crazy." Anna swivels her hips, reaches behind her and strokes the nape of his neck. Benedict rucks up her t-shirt, anchors his fingers over her pelvic bones, pressing his fingertips into her skin with just the right amount of pressure to drive Anna to distraction. Knowing where all of her hotspots are and how to unlock them makes him chuckle devilishly.  
"If we don't pump our brakes, we aren't gonna make it to bath time." She pants.  
"Would that be such a bad thing, Anna?"he asks. "Andromeda?" He purrs.  
"No, don't... Oh god! You know what that does! When you say my name like that."

She smiles, continuing to swivel and grind her hips, then in a sudden burst of sheer will, she stands up and turns to face him as he perches on the edge of her bed. Benedict instinctively grabs her bum, slides his fingers between the fabric of her panties and Anna's skin. He stops suddenly, in favor of slowly bunching up the front of Anna's shirt. He lifts the garment, pulls it over his head and motorboats Anna until she giggles and shrieks with delight.  
"Ben! What the...What are you doin' under there?" she laughs. "STAHPPIT!" she continues to laugh. "Please, sweetie... Yer killing me ovah here!"  
"Wo-man..." He rumbles.  
She steps back and playfully swats the top of his head. Benedict wraps his arms around her waist and laughs into her tummy, licking and kissing her navel for good measure. He buries his face and she plants a soft kiss on top of his head.  
"Somebody's in a better mood."  
"I am. Thanks, Anna." He looks up at her and smiles warmly.

Anna returns his gaze with an adoring smile of her own. She sighs and breaks their clench, heading for the kitchen at last. Benedict watches her leave the room, and ambles over to the en suite. Knowing Anna's penchant for mod cons, he stops at the doorway, raises his elbow, and flips on the light with the rocker switch. He chuckles to himself as he heads over to her tub. He balances himself on the edge and turns on the hot water. It comes to temperature quickly and he decides to add just enough cool water to make for a more pleasing feel on the skin.

Benedict makes use of his vantage point to scan around Anna's bathroom. The room reflects Anna's personality perfectly - unpretentious, comfy, thoughtfully appointed, and a little cheeky. To wit... A bowl full of bath bombs placed invitingly near the faucet. He picks up the bowl, furrowing his brow as sniffs and inspects each one. Benedict finds one that appeals to him and plops it into the running water. As it effervesces, he begins stripping off his clothes, then lowers himself into the warm silky water. He feels the tensions of the last few days ebb away. He closes his eyes and allows himself to enjoy the experience. Just as he feels himself begin to nod off, Anna appears in the doorway wearing a chunky robe with full pockets. She unloads her pockets, and lowers the lights, then she picks up her treats and walks over to the tub. After setting down their dessert, she unbelts her robe and stops. Benedict sits up to watch, and growls softly when she stops disrobing. He shakes his head and drops his lip to speak. Anna shakes her head.  
"Don't pull faces with me buster." She says as she turns her back. She shrugs her robe down to her hips and stops. She looks over her shoulder at Benedict and laughs in a wickedly throaty contralto. "Gimme a Chewie roar and I'll take it the rest of the way off. He braces himself on either side of the tub, throws his head back, and lets fly with a pitch perfect Chewbacca roar. True to her word, she lets the robe fall to the floor and steps into the tub. She lowers herself in front of him, slides her bum down his chest and snuggles into him.

"Well, hello Clarice." He whispers in her ear.  
"Never fancied a bath with Hannibal Lecter before. Until just now that is..."  
They both laugh.  
"I have some yummables to share." Anna reaches out of the tub and leans over to retrieve her treats.  
"You certainly do..."  
"Fancy a cake ball, Ben?" Anna removes the lid from a small container and produces a small orb covered with icing.  


  
[](http://s1375.photobucket.com/user/Miz_UndahStood/media/fanfic%20illustrations/5D03C1B9-4CC7-41EF-AFDE-7499E3D96216_zpsowvgtwrr.jpg.html)  


"Let me think... Ummm... YES!"  
"Open!" She reaches over her shoulder to place the tiny cake directly into Benedict's mouth. He holds her wrist and guides the confection onto his tongue, and playfully nibbles the pad of her thumb. With her free hand, Anna produces a tiny black bottle with a polycarb straw.  
"Here, wash it down with this..." She says as she offers him a small bottle of bubbly.  
"You spoil me! Keep this up, and I might not leave. Ever." he laughs.  
"I'm beginning to think you like spinning on that dizzy edge." she reckons.  
"The Cure? I see what you did there."  
"You are ♪Strange as angels♪" Anna vocalizes.  
"Hmmm." Benedict muses, before adding...  
"And you... are just like a dream" he rumbles.  
"Flattery is the last refuge of incorrigibles and the desperately horny. Which one are you?"  
"Both. Without question. No apologies for it." He shakes his head.  
"Let's ask our friend Luigi if he'd like to weigh in. Hello there, nice to meet you!" She undulates her bum over Benedict's crotch, and chortles seductively as he becomes increasingly tumescent beneath her.  
"Say hello to my little friend!" Benedict says, as Pacino's Tony Montana.  
" _Little _friend?"  
"Well, that's for you to decide. As many times as you'd like." He purrs salaciously,in his lower register as he nuzzles and kisses the shell of Anna's ear. She closes her eyes and allows herself to melt into Benedict. He wraps his arms around her and softly kisses her neck and shoulders.__

 

While Anna's eyes are closed, an interesting image pops into her thought bubble: Benedict and his motorbike. The image engenders a few giggles from her.  
"I just had the most wacky thought, Ben..." She searches for his hands. Finding them, she twines their fingers together as she considers her next few words: "I was wondering if this is what it's like to be your bike..." Though she can't see his expression he has a joker sized grin on his face.  
"Anna, my darlin' you've got my full attention. Do go on..." 

She shrugs as she continues: "Well, you get kitted out specially for her, yes?"  
"Not out of vanity, Anna."  
"Jacket, brain bucket, boots, and occasionally gloves, right? The whole deal."  
"Sounds about right..."  
"You give her intimate, unfettered access to your fabulous arse. And when you straddle her she vibrates and hums sweetly between your legs when as you ride her."  
"Oh, yeah..."  
"She goes willingly anywhere you want to go. She waits for you without complaint. You ride her with great pleasure, and in return she makes you feel just a touch invincible as you go tear assin' around town. Almost like you can conquer anything. True?"  
"Absolutely, yes."  
"You buy her gifts occasionally, and bathe her with great care. Your reward of course, is the occasional threesome. Admit it - you love showing her off to other women, dontcha?"  
"Yes. I do enjoy a bit of company on my bike from time to time. Is it your contention that most women are inherently jealous of motorbikes?"  
"No, but c'mon... Guys do tend to fall in love with their motorized toys. Cars, boats, planes and motorcycles. I've known men who love their cars more than their wives. But, to be fair, there is a certain romance to it all, right? Isn't that why guys give such conveyances female names?"  
"I'd never thought about it in that much detail, Anna."  
"How could you not be a little in love with her? She's sturdy, faithful, and reliable. Any woman would be foolish not to envy the attentions of a gal like that."

"That... was the most impossibly sexy description I could ever have dreamt of a man and a motorbike". He smooths his fingers up and down Anna's torso as he speaks. He speaks softly with his lips enticingly close to Anna's ear. "Our friend Luigi concurs."

"I did say it was an odd stray musing" she states rather resolutely.  
"Well, no - I believe you used the term 'wacky'" he chuckles.

"Yep. That, I did." She yawns.  
"Oh! That is contagious!" Benedict yawns too.  
"What a day. I'm kinda tired, Ben. I need my nightshirt, a blankie and a few pillows."  
"Anna?"  
"Hmmm?"  
"I know you're pretty knackered right now, but I have one favor to ask..."  
"Sure, name it..."  
"The riser? Can we try it out _at least once_ before I leave? Reverse cowgirl while you play maybe?" He pleads.  


"I'd love to. But I need a nap first"  
"Well then, off to bed with you!" He smiles a sideways grin and pulls Anna close.

She uses her big toe to flip the valve stem to empty the tub. As he steps out of the tub, Benedict reaches down and picks up Anna's robe. He holds it open for her and swaddles her in it when she lifts herself out of the tub. He lifts her hair and places soft kisses on her neck as he cradles her.

"Mmmm... Thanks." Anna sighs.

Benedict steps toward Anna and spins her so that they stand face to face. He kisses her deeply while tugging on the belt of Anna's robe, slowly removing it until he's holding it in his hand.

"Might need this. Later..." he chortles.  
"My headboard is solid, Ben."  
"Won't need it for what I have in mind."  
"Really?"

Benedict answers her question with another kiss. A blistering clash of lips, tongues and teeth - swirling, and lapping at each other's mouths. Anna captures Benedict's bottom lip between her teeth, and playfully pulls on it, worrying it a bit before wrapping her lips around his and sucking on it until it swells slightly. Benedict reaches up to touch Anna's face and give a gentle admonishment.

"Careful, luv. Nibble as much as you'd like, but no marks, please..."  
"Okay. Nibbling goood. Marking bad. Got it." Anna chuckles whiles kisses the corners of his mouth and nuzzles his nose. 

The two continue snogging, when a gurgling sound signifies the last of their bath of bath water to swirl down the drain. 

"We've been standing here too long. C'mon..."  
Anna giggles and leads Benedict out of the en suite, grabbing a towel and shutting the light on the way back into her bedroom. 

At the edge of her bed she stops to unfurl the towel. She peels off her robe and flings herself onto the towel. She looks over her shoulder at Benedict and bellows "Moisturize Meeeee!" 

  
[](http://s1375.photobucket.com/user/Miz_UndahStood/media/99F8DBCF-C9C1-4D53-8624-BF05AB95B08B_zpsrwezm7k3.jpg.html)

He laughs out loud and asks "Bedside table?"  
"Mmm-hmm."  
"Baby oil gel?"  
"Yes, please..." she purrs.

Benedict opens the drawer on her nightstand, gleefully fetching the baby oil gel and flips it open, almost in a singular movement. He squeezes the bottle, and the rude noise it makes causes Anna to snicker. 

Benedict kneels next to Anna and begins to smooth the oil over the globes of her bum. When he reaches the small of her back, he uses the pads of his thumbs to press down into the dimples just over the crest of her arse. He presses and releases them several times, causing Anna to mewl softly at his attentions. Her toes curl, and he abandons the moisturizing project in favor of flipping her onto her back. 

"Admit it, Anna. You've missed this..." he rumbles.  
"I have. And you know it."  
"What do you think we should do about it?" Benedict smiles a devilishly carnal grin. 

He props himself on an elbow, lying next to Anna as he strums her torso, from her hipbone to her collarbone and back. She lies still, closes her eyes and hums at his touch. When he reaches her breasts, he slowly traces her areolas. He takes great pleasure at the change in texture as he manipulates the petite dark circles of flesh. When both nipples have turned to pebbles, he shifts his weight and begins to knead her right breast while suckling the left. Gently, then more forcefully. Anna begins to growl and moan. She fists the hair on top of Benedict's head, weaving her fingers down to the scalp. He licks his way to her collarbone and kisses her up to her earlobe. While he nuzzles the shell of her ear, Anna guides one of his hands down to her moistening core and holds it there. 

"God, you're wet." he rumbles.  
"So. Fucking. Wet. Ben... Please don't tease me." Anna pants.  
"No? What if I'm not done with you?" Benedict chuckles as he slip two fingers inside Anna, sliding them in and out torturously slow. He's enjoying the intensity of her love sounds. The deep guttural moaning and breathless panting turn him on enormously. The ethereal expressions on her face are but a bonus. 

Benedict curls his fingers, seeking her sacred spot. Once he locates the coin sized spot inside her, he glances over it lightly, then stops. Removing his fingers and licking them greedily. Anna sighs, and relaxes as Benedict repositions himself. He kneels on the floor in front of her and parts her legs for a better view of the opening of her moistened core. He anchors a thumb above her swollen bud, nuzzles it with his nose, and flicks it several times with his tongue. He suckles it gently, wraps his lips around it and hums until she screams his name.  
"BEN! For fuck sake..."  
"Exactly, my dear." he chortles.

He uses his tongue to flip her fleshy inner petals back and forth, curls his fingers and plunges them deep inside her, stroking her languidly until he draws them over her sacred spot once again. He pumps his fingers furiously until Anna's core explodes. A stream of juices sluices from her, soaking him and the towel beneath her. Anna fists the duvet and mutters a string of invectives. Benedict stands, and gazes at Anna as she lies before him, arm over her forehead, trembling, and absolutely debauched. He pads over to the en suite for dry towels and a warm damp face cloth. He crawls up the bed and lies next to her, gently patting her sweat soaked skin with a soft fluffy towel. He takes the opportunity to kiss and kick her navel before drying her completely. 

"That was beautiful. I love watching you come undone, Anna." he kisses her softly on the forehead. Anna smiles and chuckles exhaustedly.  
"Edging me is almost cruel. You mad, sexy bastard."  
"Now can move on to, erm... How'd you put it? Sticky, sloppy seconds?" 

Anna pulls Benedict on top of her, and kisses the tip of his nose. She stares directly into his eyes as she reaches between them. 

"Light as a feather, stiff as a board" she coos. Benedict chuckles.  
"No need for that, Andromeda." He ruts against Anna, she lolls her head back and moans.

"Mmmm, I like that. Those sounds you make..."  
"Ben?"  
"Hmm?"  
"Shut up. Pin my arm over my head and..." Benedict kisses her to stop her talking. He sweeps his arm out to his side until he finds the tie to Anna's robe. Once in his grasp, he twirls it until it wraps around his wrist. He grabs one of her wrists, and binds them together tightly.  
"Oh, okay. That's what we're doin'?"

He shushes her as he lines up with her core and glides slowly into her. He closes his eyes and parts his lips as he sinks down to the root. Once he's fully ensconced, he begins to roll his hips. Anna counters his rhythm and undulates her hips languorously. 

Benedict buries his face in Anna's neck as the two pitch and roll. She brushes her fingertips over the nape of his neck and purrs contentedly. Though she's nearing exhaustion, she welcomes his fullness, and enjoys the feel of his body as they meld together. 

Anna ghosts her fingertips down his sweat slicked spine, grabs an ass cheek, and digs her nails into his flesh. He chuffs like a big cat, and moans as he thrusts harder and strokes deeper. Anna's core quivers around him and she feels a light fluttering behind her navel. 

Their sweat soaked bodies create a symphony moaning, panting, and obscenely wet sticky noises as they each plunge headlong toward climax. Anna succumbs first. The pulsating and contracting in her core intensify and she shudders as she comes. Benedict follows after, screwing his eyes shut, as a coil unwinds deep within him. Tiny tremors morph into quaking as he keens his way to a powerful release. 

The two lie boneless. Sticky, sweaty and thoroughly sated. Anna feels a bit light headed, and begins to laugh out loud. 

"Ben?"  
"Mmph?"  
"Dead weight, much?"  
"Oh, sorry..."

Benedict lists sideways, unties their wrists and pulls Anna into an embrace. He sweeps a few wet tendrils from her forehead, and kisses her face.

"I'm gonna be sore tomorrow. But I think it was worth it."

"So, erm... The riser? Later, maybe?" he ponders, kissing the shell of her ear.  
"Still?" Anna asks.  
"Oh, god... Yes!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't resist commenting on this controversy in Anna's voice. Unfortunately, it took a while for her to "speak to me". Posting this anyway. Not walkin' this one back. :~P 
> 
> “Sometimes, words get in the way...” Tavis Smiley
> 
>  
> 
> Note - what Benedict “hears”:  
> Disturbed - "Down with the Sickness" Drum Cover by Meytal Cohen  
> http://youtu.be/iLjfOk7BGTE
> 
> RUSH - TOM SAWYER - DRUM COVER BY MEYTAL COHEN  
> http://youtu.be/rKFJbSzhovk  
>  .
> 
> Katt williams in DC: Tiger/Star Player/Haters  
> (Author's Note:NSFW- strong language, intense profanity)  
> http://youtu.be/z-BMmfpsigU

**Author's Note:**

> Part III was created to bring the characters up to date. (Kinda...) Part II isn't finished, but didn't wanna write a googol of chapters to get them to the end. 
> 
> Sherlock appears in ch 1. Unless there's a compelling reason, we won't be distracting him from his work very often.


End file.
